Come again?

Frequent readers of this blog are familiar with my tendency to make a complete ass of myself every now and then at the office. It's rare. But when it happens, it's always bad bad bad.

Part of my job description is to manage and process proposals to potential clients. I recently did one for a company whose acronym starts with a "P", has an "N" in the middle, and ends with an "S." I don't want to give you the entire acronym because I think that would most definitely violate my rule to "never divulge any important details about my job or workplace." But come on people... if it has "P", "N", and "S"... what do you think of?

PENIS.

Correct. So, I was working with one of the partners on this and in my haste to avoid taking up too much of his billable hour (especially at this time of year), I asked him, "so what's the status on the P-fill-N-the-blank-S prop?"

Which I realized sounded remarkably like, "so what's the status on the penis prop?"

Now I realize we are all adults, but forgive me if I'm not totally comfortable saying "penis" to a firm partner.

After I said it, all I could think was, "Say something else. Say something else." But I couldn't think of anything else to say so I just stood there, my eyes getting wider and wider in disbelief of what came out of my mouth.

Thankfully, he broke the silence by answering my question, at which point I turned on my heel and b-lined it back to my cube with my hand shielding my face, which was no doubt the color a of red-delicious apple.

And this entire experience made me remember my sixth grade teacher making the entire sex-ed class yell "PENIS PENIS PENIS, VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA," at the top of our lungs and me being the only one out of 30 kids who couldn't stop laughing .

I'm so mature. I know.